Big boys don't cry... enough

2009-03-08T21:34:00.000-07:00

I was thinking yesterday about how there's a real call at the moment for young christian males to break the stereotype of the emotional, pathetic, push-over, Christian man. We're raising up a generation of real men, who are not afraid to be bold about their faith, who are willing to fight the good fight for Christ and for their friends who do not know Him.

This is all well and good (I myself feel a particular calling to raising up these real men) however, I also fear that we could throw the balance the other way, and have a bunch of Christian men who are up for fighting for Christ and get caught up in it all, but they take on the image that 'macho' men portray, which is that showing emotion is a weakness.

God calls us Christian men to be leaders; strong in Him, godly, prayerful, unashamed of our faith, wise, humble... Strength. It's a funny one. When some one tells you of a strong man, the first thing we think of is a weightlifter. But I believe (and I would being as lacking in muscle as I am!) that true strength is not found only in our physical ability. If we need to stand strong to opposition, or hold on strong to a belief, a cause, we need to be strong in ourselves and strong in Him, the one who this is all about. Jesus.

We all go through tough times, it's a fact. Stuff hurts us, it's a fact. There will be times when we feel wounded on the inside and if we are really going to walk with Christ we need to be able to deal with that with Him. We need to offer our hurt to Him, share our frustrations with Him. And yes, sometimes that will mean a few tears may escape. In my opinion, the worst thing you can do in these situations is bury that hurt, bury those tears. If we do not face up to our wounds, let out the hurt and offer ourselves to God to be healed, we will become more and more crippled in ourselves.

I also firmly believe that we need emotion to drive us to do God's work. Without our emotions, we would not feel for the huge number of people on this planet who, because they do not know Jesus, will not spend eternity in heaven with God, but will spend eternity somewhere they really do not want to be. We would not feel for those in unjust situations, so not being driven to social action. We would not be compelled to help anyone. We could not love.

So as men of God, let us not get so caught up in being 'real' men; and lets start being real men.

Discipleship and Stuff

2009-03-04T18:46:00.001-08:00

Just to get us started, I thought I'd post an article I wrote for j516.com - a site for discipling Christian Men

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As I’m writing the first bit of teaching, I thought I should do something that is particularly relevant for our community that we have growing here so rapidly. My name is Sam and I am one of the founders of j516. I had the vision for it a few years ago, but it only materialised last summer when I chatted to Nathan about it and he (being a complete geek) said ‘oh, yeah I could do that!’ What a legend.

My vision for this site, was grown out of a deep longing of mine to see something that is, sadly, rare in western culture today: young Christian men sharing their joys and their struggles with one another and supporting each other in their lifetime journey with Christ. This little bit of teaching is all about understanding true discipleship, and how we can support one another in that. Enjoy!

First, I want to pinch a large amount of theology from Rob Bell:
At the time of Jesus the education system was such that most of the young men (was about to write ‘sorry ladies’ but of course...) would have basic teaching. Then the best of those would move on to another level while those who weren’t good enough dropped out to learn the family trade. At the end of this ‘level’, again the best would go on to learn and those who didn’t make the cut went off for apprenticeship into the family trade. This went on until the final stage when a rabbi would come and choose the best of those still learning and take them on to be his disciples. So these kids (they’d be about our age!) would be the very best intellectually and the rabbi would have chosen them because he thinks that they could do what he does.

The rabbis were religious teachers and would have what is called a ‘yoke’. This is their understanding and interpretation of the scriptures - a complete understanding of what they meant and how that applied to everyday life and all sorts of situations. A disciple’s job was to take on his rabbis yoke, and to live it out too. Essentially, to become like his rabbi. When a rabbi chose a disciple he was essentially saying ‘I think you could be like me, I think you could take on my yoke’. So the rabbi would go to a student and say “come, follow me” and that disciple would do everything he could to be like his rabbi.

So when Jesus came to find his first disciples and he goes up to them and says “come, follow me” these young men would have known what he meant. He was a rabbi and he thought they could be like him! Now you’ll notice these guys were fishing: the family trade. They hadn’t made the cut when they’d worked through the education system, but Jesus came and told them to follow Him. When Jesus calls us to follow Him, He’s not asking us to believe in Him, He’s saying He believes in us!

So once a disciple is called, he does everything he can to please his rabbi, to be like his rabbi. He follows his Rabbi around, everywhere he goes, and he listens intently to what the Rabbi has to say. And then he tries to live it out in his own life.

Matthew 28:18-20

Jesus came and told his disciples, “I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

Here Jesus is sending out his disciples to make more disciples, more disciples of Jesus. And a long way down the chain, we too are called to be His disciples. And what do disciples do? They spend their time with their rabbi, studying what he does and says, and trying to be more like him. This is how we need to treat our relationship with Jesus; we are His followers and so should spend time with Him, study what He does and says, and try to be more like Him.

So that is the true meaning of discipleship. We are all trying to be like our rabbi. And in this community, we need to know that that is the position of every member, a disciple of Jesus Christ.

And now something very important to remember: discipleship is a journey. Over the time a disciple spends with his rabbi, he slowly grows, matures and becomes more like his rabbi. But each disciple comes from a different past, thinks in a slightly different way, finds some parts easier than others and so each disciple will grow differently. They each take a different journey to get to where they want to be. God will be doing different things with each of us, and so in a community of disciples, we have to be understanding that each one of us is at a different place with God, each one of us is unique and God has a unique plan for every single one of us.

Now understanding that, our aim in fellowship should be encouraging one another in what God has in store for each one of us. Remember that just because God is doing one thing with you, doesn’t mean that that is right for everyone else on the site. That’s not to say that God

won’t

do things with the community as a whole; or that we don’t want to hear about what God is doing; but we have to be sensitive to the fact that everyone else will be in a different place to us and not try to take them down the path we are going.

N.B. You cannot use this as an excuse to evade blatant Biblical truths. You can’t say, for example, that ‘worship isn’t what God’s got planned for me’, because there are many things that God

requires

of us. We should be truly and eagerly seeking what His plan is for us and let’s be honest with ourselves and one another where we are at with God.

Another fact of life is that we all hit hard times. In fact, I sometimes wonder if we’re going through hard times more often that stuff’s going well! But God uses these tough moments to grow us. We are

all

growing together through our struggles and as a community of disciples, we need to support each other in that, but always point each other to Christ because He is, after all, what this is all about. We are all trying to be more like Jesus.

Another very important point is that, in discipleship, we don’t always get it right! I know it’s pretty obvious but we all mess it up… most of the time really! We try to be more like Jesus, our rabbi, but often we fail. I love Peter the disciple. Sometimes he can look like a real idiot in the gospels, for example:

Luke 9:33b - NLT

Peter, not even knowing what he was saying, blurted out, “Master, it’s wonderful for us to be here! Let’s make three shelters as memorials - one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.”

He just blurted out without thinking, but I think this is a sign of his eagerness. If we look at when Jesus came out to the disciples walking on the water, Peter saw what his rabbi was doing, and he wanted to do it to (perfect discipleship!). Now we know that when Peter hopped out of the boat, he walked a little way then sank. So he didn’t master it, but Peter was a much better disciple than the others in the boat, at this point. He wholeheartedly wanted to be like his rabbi.

I think we could all be a lot more like Peter. We don’t have to get it right, but let’s at least it our all!

Something really important, I think, for us as a community to remember is integrity. If we’re really putting all our energy into being like Jesus, that should show in how we live our life, not just on the site. Let’s make sure there is symmetry between our behaviour on the site and in every day life and that the beliefs we express on the site dictate our actions.

So what am I trying to say? I’m saying that we are all disciples of Jesus Christ. We should be striving to be like Him, by spending time with Him and studying what He said and did and says and does! And as a community we must all remember we are each on a journey. Let’s support one another in that, share the journey, and always point one another to Jesus. And let’s give discipleship our all, striving to be like Him, striving to spend time with Him and studying His word.

Thoughts of a Christian Male

Big boys don't cry... enough

Discipleship and Stuff